Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Why Rely on God When You Have it Handled?
In college, I had it all figured out. I was doing well in my classes, I had friends, I had a part-time job I loved, I was active in multiple clubs, and I even founded multiple clubs. I was a shining start…until I wasn’t. When I hit the middle of my sophomore year, I was so burnt out already that I felt everything crashing down around me. I was manging the clubs I founded half-heartedly, I had run away from really good friendships, I had no idea what I wanted to do after graduating college, and worst yet I wasn’t even passionate about the degre I was pursuing/graduated with.
I know now that I was depressed and suffering from terrible anxiety. At the time, I just thought I was failing. The one person I was able to turn to for happiness during that time was my now husband. His support for me was so incredible. However, even he would be the first one to say that who I should have been turning to was God. Relying on God could have changed it all.
It’s amazing how clear hindsight is. If I would have gotten therapy or asked advice, things probably would have turned out different. In summary, if I wouldn’t have tried doing it alone, things would have been different. When it came down to it, everything I did, seemingly good or bad, came from my fear of the future. Instead of relying on God I was relying on myself. Not for a single moment did I ever trust that my future would happen unless I stressed about it. I’m not the only one that has happened to am I?
Why Not to Worry
The bad and good news for me-the future did come. I lost so much peace during those moments of stressing but I have also learned a lot from my mistakes. Mistakes that I can share and write about now. However, I think that all of us should set the goal of having the peace that following Jesus gives us. Sometimes that feels so much more easily said than done. However, in reality all it takes is practice.
Recently at the youth group my husband and I lead, we were teaching about the Sermon on the Mount. In this sermon, Jesus covers a bunch of topics. The one that is most important to me is when he teaches about worry. These verses (Matthew 6: 25-34) are very often quoted. You know, they’re the verses that talk about well birds and flowers don’t have to worry, why should you (a loved child of god) have to. I have read this verse so many time in my walk with Jesus and it’s always such a breath of fresh air. And then, I get back into life and the worries come back.
How do we actually make that breath of fresh air stick?
Worry vs. Concern
One question that came up in the lesson with the youth was what is the difference between worry and concern? Because, whether we like it or not, we do have to prepare for things in our life. How it was explained in my study bible is that “worry immobilizes you, but concern moves you to action.” This stopped me in my tracks when I first read it and honestly, it is making me tear up now.
It was so freeing to learn that difference because I could never comprehend how I was supposed to not stress and still do a good job at things in my life. It’s always been that stress and worry that drove me to the next action to make the future result “perfect.” In other words, I thought that if I did everything I could to prepare for something in the future, there was no way that event could have any negative effects on me. I wouldn’t get embarrassed, I wouldn’t mess up, and I wouldn’t feel judged.
Most of the time, I would stressfully prepare for the event and accomplish whatever it was. Although not immobilized, I didn’t have any peace. However, some times, worry would take over. I would feel so mentally done that I just didn’t care about that thing anymore. Whether it was a club I started or even a hobby I loved, I would just stop. I would find the ripcord and eject myself from that pressure in a way where I could convince myself I had no obligation or relationship to it anymore. Those are the things that hurt me to think of now. I am still working on that level of forgivness.
How to Live in the Peace of Relying on God
As a society, we have a pretty good understanding that addictions are a very widespread problem. Whether it be drugs, alcohol, sex, or even food, people are a very addict-prone creature. I recently had to ask myself “am I addicted to worry?…is that even a thing?” The answer is yes, a person can be addicted to worry. Why was I addicted to something that brought no happiness to my life? Who knows. The first step to healing an addiction is realizing that you are addicted. Now it was time to take the next step.
I needed to train my brain to think differently. A couple things helped/are helping me with this.
Prayer
When a person fasts, the point is to pray when you get hungry instead of eat. This builds a deeper connection with God. It makes your confidence in relying on God stronger. It’s the same with worry. Try this. When you start to worry, start to pray instead of diving into that non stop conversation in your head about all the things to worry about. Pray until those thoughts go away. It may take a long time for the thoughts to go away at first, but the more you practice, the easier it will become. Philippians 4:6-7 definitely feels appropriate here:
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.
It is not an automatic thing. In fact, many will tell you that just because you accepted Jesus into your life, it doesn’t make your life immediately perfect. There is still an expectation on us to follow his word and to work through these things with him. The key is to communicate and listen to what God has to tell you. You will find so much more strength and peace in the situation.
Talking it Out
Did you know that man kind’s first issue was not sin? It was aloneness. God designed us to need connection with others. It’s literally how we are wired. Everything in our body is connected and relies on something else to function, including our brain. A huge aspect of that is communicating with others. It’s this connection that gives us insight and relief in a way that can’t be duplicated. Whether it be a friend, family member, or therapist talk,ing it out can bring so much peace to the situation.
Although talking about spiritual gifts, 1 Corinthians 12 really applies here. In this chapter, we are given the example of relying on others like the body. Every body part has a different role but the body needs all the parts working together to function. Imagine what you seeking connection with others within his body can do for him? Relying on others that are following God in turn means that you are relying on God.
Taking Care of My Body
My husband jokes that that human body is a large sac of water and electricity. He is referring to the neurons, electrolytes, and how they interact with everything in the body. If something is off, it is not going to function at it’s best performance, especially the brain. When you’re out of shape, dehydrated, and not eating right, your body is going to suffer. Next time you’re stressed out I challenge you to go drink a glass of water and go for a walk. Our bodies need things. Unfortunately for us, we live in a very high-paced world. I for one definitely forget to take care of myself sometimes.
1 Corinthians 6:19–20 tells us this better than anything.
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, 20 for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
I can’t imagine a better work of art than the way God designed our bodies. Sure, you may not feel as beautiful as others in the world but I tell you this. God sees you as the most beautiful outcome of his work of making you. When we disrespect our bodies by not treating them in a way that glorifies him, it’s like telling him that we don’t care about the love that went into his design for us. For this, I challenge you to convince yourself you are beautiful that way God would next you look in the mirror. Forget how the world sees you. It will change your life and how you see yourself.
Let’s Pray
Lord, thank you for never giving up on us. You are a creative and loving God. I pray that each and everyone one of us is able to learn that relying on you is a chance worth taking. We can do this by chasing our relationship with you endlessly. The more we listen to you the more we are able to hear you. Father, I know there are those reading this suffering from isolation and I pray for courage to reach out for help. I pray they can build a connection with others and find joy in those relationships. I pray that in everything we do, we do it for you.Amen.